Winter Solstice

I love the end of the year, not only because of the holidays, but due to the fact that we are coming to the end of another year. This time of year represents reflection to me. It is a time to pause and turn inward.

We just were visited by the new moon on December 16, and now we approach the shortest day of light of the year on December, 21, the Winter Solstice. The new moon was the darkest one of the whole year, being it so close to the winter solstice. Just some background: A new moon typically represents new beginnings, withdraw, introspection, slowing down, and spiraling inward. It is a wonderful time to cast away old thought patterns and habits and begin a new project. Typically, the new moon is also when a woman begins to bleed during her menstrual or moon cycle.

Side note: My periods were very unpredictable, if not absent for years. I used to think it was cool to not get my period. Not any more. I recognize the importance of and cleansing effects of bleeding every month and honor my moon cycle. In the past 6 months, my cycles have been exactly 28 days with the moon cycle: start bleeding on the arrival of the new moon, ovulate with the full moon. I am in awe of my body for being so in-tuned with the cosmos and think it is pretty amazing! I contribute this rhythmic flow to a few things: birth 're-setting' my clock, less running, a couple of trips to the acupuncturist a year, and an overall softer approach with my body and mind. Thus, being more in-tune with myself. I also wear a Celtic moon necklace which reminds me of the feminine moon, and it seems to give me some kind of (funny to say this), 'special powers'.

So, back to the Solstice. Like the new moon, the Winter Solstice is also a time of quiet, reflection, passivity, and darkness. Darkness is not a 'negative' aspect. Many wonderful things grow out of the dark: roots, babies, dreams. This time of year we are beckoned to move inward. Not only do we go inside our home for shelter from the cold, we also move inside the home of our body and mind, seeking solace, comfort, restoration, and renewal. This is great time of year to do restorative yoga.

It is ironic that this time of year we are also 'supposed' to be busy shopping and prepping for the holidays, entertaining and being social, and feeling cheerful, merry, and bright! However, the cosmos and our natural rhythm are telling us to slow-down, rest, and hibernate. There is definitely a dissonance between how we are supposed to feel this time of year and how we really feel. After all, it is the end of the entire year, Aren't you tired? I am. We've worked hard all year long and there is so much to celebrate: accomplishments, life changes, goals achieved, letting go's, unexpected miracles, and blessing after blessing. We really need to kick-back and acknowledge the fruits of our labor now and simply rest.

To lessen this gap of how I should feel during the holidays versus how I really feel by the end of the entire year, I've incorporated a few changes into my life:

1. Listen to your body's rhythm. This past week in the evenings, I lied around on the floor very lethargically with my daughter, just playing and enjoying her. I ignored the type-A monkey mind telling me there is only once piece of fruit left in the house for tomorrow, and that I should go to the grocery store to stock-up. Monkey mind and sloth body had a talk. 'Raisins will have to do as fruit for a few days, the store will have to wait', said sloth.

2. Cut-down drastically on the Christmas shopping, thus, cut down on your stress-level and spending. Simplify. Again, I just don't feel the need to rush around right now, when my body and the stars are telling me to slow down and take it easy. Just tell those who were expecting a gift that you were honoring your rhythm, and that they should do the same! Anyway, I could never get into the commercialism of Christmas, and prefer giving gifts to people through out the year, when it feels right and more natural.

3. Reflection. I simply like to sit and quietly reflect on the whole year, giving thanks for all the ups and downs. Mostly, the downs because those are what forced me to grow the most and really were blessings in disguise when I look back.

4. Honor the family. Take time to listen to and be with your family. Baby Jesus came into this world in a quiet, humble, and peaceful stable in Bethlehem. Mary and Joseph were not out at the mall shopping for toys for him. They were on a journey to self-discovery and transformation, not concerned about outer appearances or what their stable looked like. They only cared about the safety, warmth,and love of bringing a child into the world. In that stable, the family was born. We can learn from this ancient story about the beauty of simplicity and honoring the sacredness of family. I feel we should also take a special moment to respect our own mother and father, no matter what the circumstances are, during the holidays, and make a little more peace with them and ourselves.

We turn inward, so we can extend outward. This time of year especially, our bodies and minds are calling us to pause, slow down, and go inside. Do it for yourself, and do it for all the people around you. Holidays were not meant to be stressful. They were meant to be enjoyed, times to stop working, and for celebrating goodness with family and friends. Reflect, give thanks, marvel in and let-go of the past year, and dream about the dazzling New Year on the horizon!

Contentment

Santosha. The Sanskrit word for contentment. It is easy to feel contentment when everything is feeling fine: full fridge, tidy house, car washed, emails read and responded to, dinner cooked, eaten, and cleaned-up while still feeling the endorphins soothe my mind and body from an afternoon run. (Skipped the beer even because still feeling very relaxed and the Santosha). Oh, did I mention, my one and half year old daughter is also with her dad for the day, so I could 'accomplish' all this and more, AND relax! And, now feeling excited and refreshed to see her again! Santosha. Charlie Brown Christmas music, Enya Silent Night, now Gypsy Kings!

But, can I feel this Santosha tomorrow, when kid one is screaming for milk, kid two can't get to sleep, kid three is throwing a tantrum because I won't let her touch the computer, and I feel dirty because there is no time to escape to the shower? Will I remember to breathe, relax into the chaos, and celebrate impermanence? One day flying high, full of energy, next day irritated and weeping on the sofa because I'm so tired.

Life ebbs and flows. Emotions rise and fall away. Impermanence everywhere.

Contentment is a state of mind. It already exists in all of us. It's just a matter of shifting perspective. The easiest way to access contentment when you're feeling 'messy' and want things to be different, is to pause and give gratitude for what is (even the screaming kids because I am sure you would miss this noise if they suddenly went away). Keep it simple when cultivating gratitude in the moment, e.g., hands to lift the coffee mug to your mouth, the earth to stand on, being able to lift the corners of your mouth in a smile if you want to. The small act of giving thanks for 'what is' is choosing to accept the present moment whatever is going on, and choosing to BE OK with the present, which is already perfect. Contentment is easy to find when things are fine, but it is as equally accessible when things are not so fine. I dare you to dive below the surface. There, you will find a treasure chest of fine things. Help yourself to a serving of santosha in this moment!